When your self-esteem is low, you feel depressed and hopeless. You see life negatively. Everything seems difficult, or too much trouble. It feels as if the world is a bad place, full of people who will abuse or ignore you, and you feel unable to do anything about it.
You end up treating other people as potential enemies, or saviours, and sooner or later they treat you badly or let you down. It’s a vicious circle.
Other people’s treatment of us affects our self-esteem; for example, if you have a boss or work colleague who is constantly undermining your authority or questioning your work, this can lead to you becoming very unsure of achieving what you once knew you were very capable of doing. Likewise, at home; if another member of the family is constantly picking at everything you do, eventually you believe that maybe you really aren’t good at anything and begin to feel worthless.
It’s that sense of worthlessness and powerlessness in low self-esteem that we can root back to the abuse. Being told things such as “your not worth anything”, “you deserve to be punished”, “this is because your bad” seeps into our being and the words ingrain themselves in our ‘self’. We believe it to be true, believe it’s a fact. But guess what, it’s not true.
They are the words used to keep us silent. They are words used to ensure the person that abused you got away with what he, she or they were doing.
Breaking the silence means that we break free from those words and we regain the power and control that was taken away. We gain back a sense of who we are and our true and valuable worth. The more we feel potent, the better our self- esteem.
When your self-esteem is high, on the other hand, the world feels like a good place, full of friends, potential pleasures and opportunities. You can assert yourself, ask for what you want and express your feelings. You feel potent, and know that you can make a difference. Other people, in general, respond to your positive attitude, so that, even when you don't get your way, you feel good about yourself and them. This reinforces your self-esteem and stimulates your inner growth.
Break the silence… increase your worth!
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