When I was 7, I went through the atrocity of sexual abuse. Up to 6 months ago, aged 23, I had kept everything bottled up. I told no one. I felt it was my fault, I was scared and I felt like I was on my own, thinking over the years what people would think.
Would anyone believe me? Would I become the butt of dirty jokes?
In 2010, the Police came to my house and asked me if I had ever been sexually abused. I was stunned. It came out of the blue. After calming down they asked me if I would do a statement and after 10 mins I said I would. It was not easy having to talk about the most traumatic time I had ever been through. I did a statement over a video link but it took 6 months to do it. It took that long because even though I was speaking to a male, I still felt very uneasy.
The Police were very good to me, I knew I wasn’t on my own anymore.
As time went on towards the trial, speaking more about it made my confidence grow.
But going through the trial, it affected me more than I thought. Meeting the attacker face to face and seeing him go to prison for what he had done to me, that weight on my shoulders which I had for 16 years gradually got lighter.
In May 2012 I told my story to Bella Magazine, just for the reason that I dont want other people in the situation I was in; to suffer in silence.
Speak out, let other people know about the bastards who live around us. Never feel alone.
I want to give back because I know through experience how bad it can be. There is support and help out there so don’t suffer in silence.
I hope this book can give hope and peace for people going through a traumatic time as I did. I hope you will find this information inspiring.
If you would like to read my story go on the web and get Bella Issue 31, or check out Survivors Manchester for more details. Keep strong